Ramblings of an unsettled mind and a broken heart.

Why is it that the good people are always taken away from us too soon? They’re taken right at the moment where they are meant to be enjoying their lives, fulfilling them to the fullest. One bright smile in the morning, kissing you goodbye, caressing your cheek and kissing your lips ever so gently, in promise to see one another soon. And to find out that not too much after that that sweet, soft good morning kiss is the agonizingly bitter kiss goodbye. You find yourself grasping at the sheets, desperately pinching yourself over and over again, trying to wake up from this nightmare; finding that the nightmare becomes your reality. No matter how hard you pinch yourself, no matter how much you hope and pray, that he’s never coming back.

                What makes it worse is that they’re gone, just as their life begins, just as they are about to experience the many joys of life, and just as they are planning to start a family with that same person they have been with for over 7 years. Life is cruel, it’s unjust and the fact that we don’t take advantage of every moment is concerning.

                I haven’t personally lived very long, always in the strict confinements of my own home, having wog parents with wog rules always limiting me from doing things that I want to do. In their minds they’re protecting me… however it’s cases like these that make me think that if I was here today and gone tomorrow, did I really live?

                When we’re little, we always tend to wish we were grown-ups; we wish to drive, to fall in love, to get married and live in a beautiful palace and have hundreds of babies and that life will be A-Okay. It’s not until we start growing up, that we realize that falling in love hurts, getting married isn’t easy, and living in a palace is well out of your budget. But most of all you realize the haunting truth – that life is just too short. It’s unjust. It’s cruel.

                What I’m trying to say is, you and I were once childhood friends; you’d look after me, care for me and put up with me just like an older brother. Whenever I visited mum’s class, you were the first one to put your arms around my shoulders and guide me. You put up with my constant MSN pestering as I was going through the needy incessant teenager stage without ever once ignoring me or blocking me out. We may not have spoken in a long time, but those small memories, the fact that you made an impact on my childhood and somewhat left a footprint in my heart after all these years. You used to talk to me about your childhood sweetheart, how much you cared for her – making me believe that love truly does exist. And having found out that you married her only two weeks ago makes my heart sink. You’re gone now, but your memory won’t ever fade. Gone at only 20 years of age, you leave us with the age old life lesson: Life is short. Rest in peace Bedz, may God have mercy on your soul… and may you be in a better place, where that cheekily sweet smile blooms on your face forever. 


Well, this is my sad post saying how much hell VCE is and how I will miss you all, but seriously, given all my extra-curricular, I’m just not coping. So, I’m saying goodbye to BMU, to the team, and I hope you will all continue posting, and keep our little blog going.
Best wishes…

Complaints, Solutions and… Oh yes, FUN! (naht!)

Hey Guys!
So, I started off complaining about year 12 as it is the main thing going on in my life at the moment… heck… it’s the ONLY thing going on in my non-existent, sad excuse I have for a ‘life’. Yes, yes, complain, complain. But today I realized, as I sat hunched over my chemistry text book, intensely staring at questions, trying so desperately to focus on actually answering them, I realized that hating year 12 isn’t going to exactly magically straighten it all out. I mean, seriously guys.. I honestly think it was me trying to find something to hate (yes, I’m over hating my ex.. that was SO LAST YEAR! *girly voice*). Yeah I’m kidding, I didn’t even hate my ex. You see, I have this thing where I cannot hate people; even if they act like total moronic half-wits and try SO hard to bring me down, I can’t hate them. Instead I channel my anger into hating objects. Or events. Or the WAY people act, but not them themselves. Confused? I thought so. But anyways, ramble ramble ramble.

My mind is currently in overdrive mode as I have JUST finished drinking my fabulous drink of V. Yes, I am aware that A Current Affair recently had a sector on how it contains carcinogens and all… BUT I NEED TO STAY AWAKE! So I have been forever listening to such amazing, beautiful, spontaneous lyrics of Weird Al Yankovic. Because he is a lyrical genius. And he cracks me up! So this is an embarrassing screenshot of me taken by my friend whilst serenading him with ‘White n Nerdy’ on our Skype session.

yes… Quite charming indeed. AnyHowzerHoffleHuff, I shall bid thee all good day/night/noon/morning/zombie/cat/duck/coldsore.
Keeeeeeeeep smilin’! ^.^
Ex’s and Oh’s.